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The Big Bouncy Bulbous Balloon Breasts Edition of GameStooge

One too many trips to the Wizard on Park and 73rd...GamesRadar has a funny story on the history of the obsession with mammoth mammaries in the Soul Calibur series, and how unrealistic these female characters are.

To quote Rita Rudner: “I don’t think they had silicon injected – they had helium. They’re so big you can’t close the game box.” Or as Marge Simpson would say: “Her maguppies have become bazongas!”

On a serious note, how damaging are these images to women? What about the realistic effects, such as the facts these women are wielding swords. Aside from the possibility of accidentlly cutting a thin little strand holding these bras up, isn’t there a high probability of serious damage? Not to mention the back problems in the first place…

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    18 Responses to “The Big Bouncy Bulbous Balloon Breasts Edition of GameStooge”

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    1. Derrick Schommer Says:

      damaging effects? I didn’t know that was a concern most guys that play these games actually care about.

      What about back problems?

    2. jonahfalcon Says:

      You do know why a lot of women have breast REDUCTION surgery, right? I mean, her breasts probably constitute half this woman’s body weight!

    3. MitchyD Says:

      She’ll be a hunchback before she’s thirty! :O

    4. HarryB Says:

      Video game characters don’t have back problems or get hunchback unless the creators want them to.

      For all you know, that “thin little strand” could be made of a special magical titanium alloy, or better yet… an extraterrestrial-born material that has the look and feel of cloth but is stronger than diamonds.

      The point is.. it’s make-believe. You can suspend disbelief. You don’t have to be concerned with how she can go poop between fights when her sword won’t fit in a bathroom stall with her or worry about and debate the physiological disadvantages of her anatomical proportions.

    5. jonahfalcon Says:

      The psychological damage is very real.

    6. Game Stooge » Soul Calibur IV + Online > Ivy’s Boob Job: The most up to date gaming and tech news blog on the planet. Says:

      [...] Hopefully this will be compatable with the inevitable Create-A-Character we saw in the third iteration of Soul Calibur. Taking a unique persona online and opening up a can of whoop-ass on someone else would be just super – and here’s hoping that Namco really gets online fighting right. We’re looking at you, last decade of video games. It’s not all about breasts, (though maybe it still is.) [...]

    7. Fable 2 Sketches Feature Bountiful Boobs | Game Stooge Says:

      [...] expected boobilicious women in games like Dead or Alive Xtreme 2 or Soul Calibur 4, but recent images – some disturbing – from Fable 2 have popped up on GameSpy. They’re [...]

    8. Soul Calibur IV Teaser Trailer On Marketplace | Game Stooge Says:

      [...] Ivy and her massive bazongas, but yes, the female characters’ breasts bounce, a la Dead or Alive. Honestly, some of these [...]

    9. fairgame Says:

      wait a sec from what i remember the problem with otehr games was the fact that the characters body was not proportionate to their breast size(ie lara croft with that tiny waist from many years ago) if ya look at ivys body she has big hips and a rahter sturdy waist. she has ” junk in the trunk” seems to me shes the most realistic large breasted chaeacter i have ever seen in a game. ( as in her body matches her breasts).

    10. Jonah Falcon Says:

      Ivy has an entire junkyard in the trunk.

    11. Soul Calibur IV Comes Out July 29 | Game Stooge Says:

      [...] there be machinima with Ivy and her massive orbs? Magic 8 ball says, “Count on [...]

    12. Today’s Virtual Console Titles: May 5, 2008 | Game Stooge Says:

      [...] River Street Ransom and Double Dragon. This is the third straight week of DD cloning (no, not the Ivy sort of DD cloning.) For that matter, PPL is a lame licensed ripoff, [...]

    13. “Star Wars Fans, Get Out Your Wallets” - Namco Says:

      [...] Soul Calibur fan has made me follow the development of this game quite a bit. From the extremely large breasts added on to the announcement of Star Wars characters stealing the spotlight in an already great game. More [...]

    14. Phil K Says:

      Always makes me laugh reading wet behind the ears spotty brats berating how “demeaning” big boobs are, and how they don”t exist really.

      Oh they do – but the owners of said big boobs want nothing to do with half-men.

      Salute the mouthy talentless [censored] and skinny titless horrors all you like – but be a bit more honest for a change.

      You’ll bash the bishop thinking about the very big boobs you supposedly sneer at, and download Danni Ashe pics, then agree with some man-hating lesbian who talk utter bullshit, and lusts after the big tits itself (they’re not worthy of the prefix her-)

    15. Jonah Falcon Says:

      Bash the bishop?

    16. Jonah Falcon Says:

      No, really. Bash the bishop?

    17. Mr Phillip Says:

      If I actually gave a shit about reality-vs-big tits, I wouldn’t be playing a FANTASY GAME.

      Bring on the tata’s and let the tiny-titted haters be damned.

    18. » Big Balloon Boobs Return to Soul Calibur V - Game Stooge: The most up to date gaming and tech news blog on the planet. Says:

      [...] Japanese obsession with Ivy’s breasts is just boundless, isn’t it? Last year, her boobs reached epic proportions in Soul Calibur IV. For Soul Calibur V, they’re just right there in your [...]

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